Second Trimester

Mommy knew you were going to be a little girl before she was even pregnant. While driving in the car with daddy, the summer before you came mommy said if we are having a girl I'd like to name her Evangeline. Daddy asked what I thought your middle name should be. I told him I'm not sure. He said, "How about Virginia?" I felt a wave of comfort come over me, and I knew that Evangeline Virginia was to be your name.

Our girl was a "mover and a shaker" from the moment she was conceived. The technician used that exact phrase, "mover and a shaker", while she was trying to get a good picture from your ultrasound and you wouldn't hold still. She was really young and that wasn't a phrase I thought she would say, so it shocked me a little. That's something your great-grandmother Virginia used to say, so I knew she was there. 

As I worked in the temple, with you inside me, I sensed that you seemed to have a special connection to Mother Eve, so I thought Evangeline was a beautiful way to honor that relationship. Grandma Evelyn was a mother figure to daddy, and we wanted to honor her. Aunt Angela was another inspiration for your name because she was always a beautiful mother figure for me.

Mommy went to lunch with her sisters and told them that she was pregnant with you, aunt Ann already knew because I asked her for some advice on the healthiest supplements to use. We told your grandparents your gender by giving them scratch off cards that the doctor gave us on December 19th, and we told the Facebook world by posting a picture of your first outfit. We received an outpouring of love and congratulations from everyone. We all knew you were going to be a special little miracle in all of our lives. 

First Trimester

On October 1, 2016 mommy sent daddy a few pictures of a positive pregnancy test, to let him know that you were coming. He was at Primary Children's hospital for school. We had been waiting for you for quite some time, so mommy couldn't wait a minute longer to tell daddy the wonderful news. Mommy wept tears of joy at the thought of your arrival. Daddy couldn't make out the pictures, because his phone wasn't very advanced at the time, so he showed the nurse he was with and asked her, "She wouldn't send me a pregnancy test if she wasn't pregnant, right?"

On October 21, 2016 we heard your heartbeat for the first time. Nothing can prepare you for that moment, where you realize that this little one has been trusted to your care, and you’re responsible for another human being. You would be coming our way in a few short months. Mommy and daddy were so excited, and relieved, to hear that fast little heartbeat and see that everything indicated that you were doing great!

Your expected day of arrival was May 30, 2017.

Miracles Do Happen

As I look back on 2016 I have to reflect on all of the miracles we have experienced. It started off rather heart breaking. We had completed our home study and had our adoption profile up and running, thanks to a lot of support from family and friends. We were even contacted by a woman named Margaret (my mother's name) who claimed she wanted us to "have her twins," who were expected to arrive July 14th (my sister's birthday). Sadly, there never were any twins.  She had been reaching out to several families and promising them the very same thing. Luckily for us, Rans was able to spot a few inconsistencies in her story. My heart felt like it had shattered into a billion pieces as I grieved the loss of two little ones who who had never even existed. As I decided to forgive Margaret, and move forward, I witnessed a miracle.

My friend Jaimie was an answer to prayers. We decided we would start the "Couch Potato to 5K" running app together, to take back our health and prepare our bodies to be able to chase after those little ones who were waiting to join our families.

Part of this endeavor led me to seek out medical advice from a diabetic doctor, huge step for me! I came from a not so pleasant background of demeaning and discouraging encounters with doctor after doctor, why should this experience be any different? Enter the next beautiful miracle in our story, Callene. Luckily for me Rans, my protector and interpreter, was able to join me for my first appointment with this new physician. I was physically sick as we pulled up. What was this new physician going to tell me I sucked at today? We walk in the front door and were welcomed by a very friendly receptionist, who really seemed interested in our story.  She even inquired about our adoption journey, after we told her that was my main reason for visiting today. Then came the part I was most nervous about, the NP chat.

We sat down, shared a few pleasantries, she looked over my chart and said something that shifted our journey completely. "So, I heard you talking and I was just wondering why aren't we trying to have a baby?" I was stunned. I explained to her that every doctor who had ever talked to me about this subject told me I couldn't or shouldn't try to have a baby.  The tears were starting to push their way to the surface. She responded, "Well, I see no reason that you shouldn't try. We can work on getting your A1C down around a 6, because I don't see anything that suggests that you wouldn't be able to have your own baby." Tears started rolling. Rans and I held each others hands and just focused on that beautiful statement we'd just heard. She kept using the magical term "WE". We can do this...

Hope is a powerful tool. We took an incredible journey to New Zealand, and shortly after coming home from the healing trip we found out that you, our sweet little one, would be joining our family in a few months.